The intention of this post is to reassure every single women and especially moms with body image issues that we ALL have them.
These photos of me were taken exactly 8 days after giving birth to my daughter, Emma. I knew I had a "pouch" but I didn't care. I was so proud of my body for the absolute miracle of being able to birth 2 kids, 18 months apart. I was superwoman. My body was a freaking machine!
Prior to this, I would've been on a diet for months before allowing any bikini pictures to be taken of me, let alone actually post them. I remember a few years back exercising and dieting like a machine for months before going on vacation to Zanzibar and even then I wasn't entirely happy with my body.
The pride I had in my body, was unfortunately short lived though. We are all constantly inundated, with edited photos of women and even though, we all know those pictures aren't real, we still unconsciously shame ourselves for not looking a certain way.
My weight has fluctuated over the last year, it's gone up and down. I've been proud to show it off and the complete opposite.
Recently after literally, just being told by my doctor to actually put on at least 5kgs, we went to the beach for father's day. There were women of all shapes and sizes there but I noticed that all of the women around my size were covered in either dresses or shorts and t-shirts. I on the other hand, was wearing a bikini and kimono. I just wanted the sand to gobble me up and swallow me whole. Instead of enjoying this wonderful day at the beach with my family, I was worried about what everyone else on that beach was thinking.
My journal that night was all about how how self conscious I had felt. I did guided meditations on self love for the next few nights and when I was "over" it. I chatted to my friends and family about it.
Their responses were as you'd expect "what are you talking about?", "if you think you're fat then I must be obese", "your crazy, I wish my body looked like yours", ect.
Now, had I told them about how I was feeling on the Sunday, their responses would've fallen on deaf ears. I had to do the work within myself, by meditating and jouranalling to feel that great sense of joy and pride within my body again.
So ladies, if you start to feel these insecurities creeping in, remember that we all have them. And most importantly nothing external can take them away. You need to do the work on yourself (whatever that looks like for you) to stop them from taking over. Remember thoughts become things.
Oh and those people who you think are judging you, probably aren't. They're thinking about what to cook for dinner that night, what work they have to catch up tomorrow, what chores they need to get done, ect.
Sure maybe 1 jerk is judging you and if that's the case, send that person love. Because that person must truly be in a really insecure and terrible place within themselves, to feel the need to project that self hatred on to others.
Have a great rest of your long weekend and rock those bikinis ladies!
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